I stumbled through the doors of the Lancer's Guild, shaking the rain off of myself.
I gave a sigh, and proceeded to the counter. Unfortunately for me, someone was already here, chatting away. I turned and looked around.
The Lancer's Guild's lobby was a lot smaller than I had expected. Maybe I'm just too used to thinking of Lancers and Dragoons as deserving of honors. Seems like almost everyone holds a spear here.
After staring at the walls for a bit, it was finally my turn.
The clerk, Jillian, seemed eager to let me join the ranks of new Lancers. As she spoke of the training and tasks I would endure as a fledgling Lancer, I shivered with delight. Finally, I would learn to use this spear properly!
I enrolled in the Lancer's Guild joyfully, prepared to start my journey.
Jillian smiled as I wrote my name down on the dossier, and told me there was one thing left that I had to do... speak to the Guild Master. She motioned to the door next to her, and I took a step back.
I felt a lump in my throat. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing more in this world that I want than to learn the ways of the Lancer, to do what I feel is destiny... but there is still a part of me that doubts that I will be capable. That fear came creeping out at that moment. What if he says I'm not "Lancer material?"
No, I scolded, Don't think like that. If he could do it, you can... You have his blood, after all!
I shut my eyes and opened them anew, determined to do whatever was asked of me.
As I walked into the next room, I saw people training vigorously. Two were doing push-ups while one stabbed a training dummy, and another spun a lance over his head as if he wished to take flight. All the while, a man stood against a pillar, staring at me...
"And you are?" he suddenly inquired.
Guess this is the Guild Master... come on, you can do this.
"Skyla Leitero, sir, I'm new here."
He nodded, and he began to give me what I imagined to be the usual new adventurer speech. My nerves were quelled when he made mention that I'd have to train hard to become a true Lancer... Training hard is fine. Having it be impossible to attain isn't.
It was then that the conversation got a bit more serious. He told me about the history of the spear, the basic techniques employed, among other useful information. I listened with wide eyes, taking it all in.
It was then that he said something that made my heart skip a beat...
"A true lancer, however, flinches not before his enemies, for he knows not the meaning of fear. Ever does he press forward, disdainful of the odds, that he might pierce the enemy line and open a path to victory."
It was as if the world stood still for that one moment, and memories flooded back to me... memories of cold nights alone, playing possible scenarios in my head of how my father my could have died.
And suddenly, all I could think of was a faceless Dragoon, charging headlong into a horde of enemies that nothing short of a miracle would bring to its knees...
I closed my eyes, shaking off the thoughts that had decided to plague me at a most inopportune moment.
Thankfully the Guild Master was busy talking of how perseverance was the key to success, and failed to notice me drifting into deep thought for a moment there.
"Are you ready to attack things with reckless abandon for your first task?"
I nodded silently, and he sent me off to go kill some funguar, ladybugs, and squirrels just outside the city.
I feigned a smile, clenched my fists, and went on my way, fighting my own mind.