Tuesday, October 6, 2015

The Adventures of Maddie: The Disgruntled Apprentice

This is a cross-post from my personal Facebook page, so don't think I've written up anything special for you blog-followers. I don't have the time for that, so at least enjoy your scraps.

ANYWAY.

THE ADVENTURES OF MADDIE!
Today's adventure: The Disgruntled Apprentice!

I've been donating my time after my sculpture class to add glaze to abandoned ceramics pieces, so they can be sold in November to buy new glazes for the next semester. I ended up glazing all of the scrap box, so I asked the ceramics teacher if she had any more pieces. She said I could glaze her own personal demonstration pieces, and put them in the scrap box for me.

Cut to after class, when my "charity" glazing time begins. I grab this nice little serving dish, decide to glaze it up with earth tones. I finish in about an hour, go to put it the kiln room, and I notice THE BOX IS EMPTY AND THE PIECES ARE GLAZED ON THE SHELF. And they look like they were glazed by a 5 year old throwing a tantrum.
So I go outside the kiln room and ask one of my buddies if he saw anyone glazing. He says he saw the ceramics teacher's apprentice hanging about in the kiln room, and it all makes sense.

This girl, this apprentice, is a little full of herself from what I've seen. Back when I was taking Ceramics class she hovered over my shoulder and grabbed a plate I was making, and took a tool and said "YOU MUST USE FINESSE!" and she literally starts smoothing my piece while repeating the word "finesse" over and over, and I'm just sitting there like "wtf is happening" until she hands it back to me and is like "SEE?" and leaves. 

Anyway, she must have either recognized her "master's" pieces or overheard our conversation earlier in the day (she's always lingering about somewhere in the studio) and was jealous as all hell, so she grabbed the remaining pieces and glazed them as fast as she could so I couldn't get to them.

At first I was like "wtf" but then it was just funny because here's this chick who is supposed to be an artist's apprentice, and here she's intimidated that I'm glazing her master's scrap pieces... And in the meantime she makes them look like shit. 

I also think that this plate might have had something to with it.


See this plate? I glazed that. It's not the most amazing thing on the planet, but it was a scrap piece and I decided I'd freehand a pattern onto it while testing out some fun colors. Well, today when I walked into the Ceramics studio, I had the entire group of older ladies and even an older gentleman crowding around me asking me which glazes I had used. This silly plate was the hottest thing to come out of the kiln, and I think that might have sparked some animosity in the apprentice.

Too bad, so sad.

Gonna keep on glazing, AND sharing all of my glaze secrets, because I'm cool like that.

I'm an awful blogger (and social media user in general)

Holy crap, am I horrible at keeping a blog.

How do you all manage to keep up with social media? I mean, between Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, and blogging, how the hell has half the population of the Internet not gone mad yet?
I can barely keep up with TWO of those platforms, and some people seem to have wires coming out of their asses, keeping in tip-top social media standing. 

Do you secretly have clones of yourselves splitting up the work? Have hired minions to do your work for you? Previously unknown twins that you've managed to keep under wraps for your social media updating needs?

Maybe I'm just getting fucking old.